The Mots’ Song

Plink-plonk, plink-plink-plonk

Groucho couldn’t stand it any longer.

Elvis just wouldn’t stop practicing – always that same plink-plonk, plink-plink-plonk.

Not that Elvis played badly. It was just so b-o-r-i-n-g! Always the same plink-plonk, plink-plink-plonk. Day and night, just plink-plonk, plink-plink-plonk!

“Harpo, we need to call a meeting, ” asked Groucho. “This plink-plonk, plink-plink-plonk is driving us all crazy.”

“But Elvis really loves his music” replied Harpo. “I don’t think that we should stop him expressing himself.”

“He’s not expressing himself! He’s expressing plink-plonk, plink-plink-plonk!” exclaimed Groucho. And I REALLY can’t stand it any longer!”

“All right,” agreed Harpo. “Let’s see what the others think.”

All of the Emots and Imots gathered in the kitchen for the meeting. Elvis was the last to arrive but you could tell that he was coming as the plink-plonk, plink-plink-plonking got louder and louder.

“Elvis, some of the guys are finding your playing a little bit irritating” began Harpo.

“A little bit!” exclaimed Groucho. “And I don’t call that playing – it’s just plink-plonk, plink-plink-plonking!”

“Oh, I’m sorry!” said Elvis. “I didn’t realise. Perhaps if I practice some more, I’ll get better and you’ll all like it.”

“MORE!” shouted Groucho. “More plink-plonk, plink-plink-plonking! That’s the last thing we need!”

“We need to compromise” said Harpo. “Elvis, why don’t you give us a little concert and then we can all have a break for a while.’

“Oh no!” moaned Groucho but Elvis was beaming. “Sure” he said and started his favourite tune:
plink-plonk, plink-plink-plonk – plink-plonk, plink-plink-plonk – plink-plonk, plink-plink-plonk.

Groucho let out an unbelievable groan: “Ooo-aah-oowww-ch-ch!”

“Hey, that sounds great!” exclaimed Gummo. “Do it again!”

Groucho looked mystified but let out his moan “Ooo-aah-oowww-ch-ch!”

“That’s it!” said Gummo. “Now do in time to Elvis’ playing”

“Ooo-aah-oowwwch-ch-ch!” went Groucho.
“Plink-plonk, plink-plink-plonk” went Elvis.
And the two together did sound pretty good.

Harpo grabbed two saucepan lids and started banging them together:

“Bang-smash crash-crash-crash!”

And Chicho started dancing to the music.

“I get it” said Harpo. “Elvis was playing all the right notes but without the Emots joining in, it’s boring.”

“We need some words so that we can sing along” suggested Zeppo. “Can you make up some words, Bill?”

“I think so” replied Bill. “How about:

The Emots need the Imots
(plink-plonk, plink-plink-plonk)
and the Imots need the Emots
(plink-plonk, plink-plink-plonk)
the Imots without the Emots
(plink-plonk, plink-plink-plonk)
make Groucho go mad.
Ooo-aah-oowww-ch-ch!”

Everybody laughed and started dancing and singing along.